They conspire to do everything and anything. Everything which is bad almost inevitably involves their conspiracy. Brazil's and Argentina's defeats at the World Cup are also because of them. (England's defeat is not due to them though. The English players are just too damn lame!).
(Digression. Football joke of the day. David Blaine is gutted. His record for doing absolutely feck all in a box for 42 days has been shattered by Wayne Rooney. LOL!!!)
They rule the world. They are bad.
And of course in certain countries, ours included, they are also the perennial punching bags for people hoping to score some political brownie points.
Who are they?
They are the Juice.
Notice the similarity with this?
It appears to be universal, this totally inexplicable urge to entertain. Our little neighbour down South, is not to be left out when it comes to this kind of thing. IN response to my satire, "Kami tak kow tow, kau tau?", a person, professing to be a Singaporean, posted this comment:
"1. 20% of crime rate down...
2. 2 submarines...
This doesn't prove anything about malaysia malay kow-towing to anyone...
ON the other hand, We singaporeans do not need % and figures to tell us that our crime rate has gone down...because all along we are given a good ranking due to our utterly low crime rate internationally.
2 submarines doesnt mean can win us...It doesnt threaten us a single bit, please...
and we do not even have cases of stolen aircraft engine parts besides your country...
So it just proves that w/o having to kow-tow to anyone, u people are already losing national assets like losing money in gamling at Genting Highland."
A part of my reply (I don't know why I even care to reply, but I did for the heck of it!) says:
"This blog is not about comparing who has the bigger sexual organ. And if you are in the habit of doing so, perhaps you should not visit this blog.
Have a good Sunday."
And yesterday, my remark about some people "comparing who has the bigger sexual organ" took a surreal twist, when a piece of news from Singapore was titled "S'porean seeks sponsor to enlarge breasts".
It is here. An extract would not be out of place, just to prove a - or several - points :-
"A YOUNG Singaporean is seeking sponsorship for breast enlargement to enable her to sport a bikini for an online show, China Press reported.
The 22-year-old wants to enlarge her breasts from size 29A to 32C for the online show titled Bored in Bikinis, which requires its hosts to wear bikinis for various activities, including playing games and reading the news."
I rest my case.
But of course, Malaysia has to compete. And so, the Malay Mail reported that KD Tunku Abdul Rahman "remains at the Teluk Sepanggar naval base in Sabah as problems have again resulted in the submarine being docked."
I am restraining myself from writing my normal four letter word reaction in order to prevent an "x" rating for this article. What the bloody hell is happening? Why are there so many problems with the submarines?
If it cannot dive in tropical waters, why the heck did we buy it in the first place? And how do Singapore and Indonesia manage to make their submarines work properly? The last time I checked, the water there is the same with our water (except Singapore Newater of course!).
Why don't we just buy this?
We could have saved a hell lot, no?
Then, yesterday we have this news. "A member of parliament was rushed to hospital today after he felt unwell when attending a durian fest and mutton promotion at the multipurpose hall at Parliament House here."
I hope he is okay. Surely we do not want another by-election. Too much money is involved. The country could ill afford it. Petronas is not doing well. Sime Darby is not exactly the definition of "profit making corporation".
But it struck me.
A durian and mutton promotion in the Parliament house?
Is it me or everything is going nuts?